People Use Self-Control to Risk Personal Harm: An Intra-Interpersonal Dilemma

People will smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, binge eat, drink coffee, eat chili peppers, fail tests, steal, ingest illicit drugs, engage in violent and sadistic actions including killing, have sex, and seek to become HIV positive for the sake of interpersonal acceptance. The self-control for personal harm model reconceptualizes behaviors that have both urge and control components as demonstrating either successful or failed self-control, depending on the incipient urge. The model underscores the role of expected social rewards as an important incentive for which people sometimes engage in personally risky and aversive behaviors despite feeling that they would rather avoid the behaviors and attendant harm. Research from diverse perspectives converges to show that risky behaviors, which might on the surface appear to be self-control failures, can in fact require self-control exertion.

Self-control: toward systematic training programs

Selected literature is reviewed regarding the question, How may children's self-control skills be developed or improved through training? It is premature to give up on psychosocial methods of training self-control. Self-control is fostered by being in a long-term positive relationship with a dependable person who communicates the value of this goal; working at self-control challenges carefully chosen to be at the correct level of difficulty for present skill; getting many positive models of the successful exercise of self-control; logging in many hours of practice where valued rewards are contingent upon greater and greater exercise of effort; learning that valued rewards can be obtained by effort, and thereby learning to enjoy effort; using fantasy rehearsal; learning compliance skills; learning verbal concepts (including a term for self-control itself) that affect the world view in ways conducive to this skill; learning the art of self-instruction; learning to remove oneself from tempting stimuli, physically and mentally; and learning self-monitoring.