How Do Invested Partners Become Invested? A Prospective Investigation of Fledgling Relationship Development

Investment-the feeling that one has put considerable resources into a relationship-is theorized to play a key role in relationship persistence. Yet, the development of investment is not well-understood. We recruited 256 individuals in new dating relationships and surveyed them each week for up to 25 weeks. This design allows us to test underlying theoretical assumptions about how people become invested in new dating partners. Some assumptions, such as the idea that investment increases over time, were confirmed. Other assumptions were not supported: Feelings of investment were quite high after only a few weeks of dating and were not strongly shaped by concrete relationship milestones. Rather, feelings of investment were strongly linked to other subjective indicators of relationship development, such as feeling attached to the partner and believing that the relationship had a good future. We discuss the implications of these findings for existing models of investment.

Pursuing Safety in Social Connection: A Flexibly Fluid Perspective on Risk Regulation in Relationships

People are fundamentally motivated to be included in social connections that feel safe, connections where they are consistently cared for and protected, not hurt or exploited. Romantic relationships have long played a crucial role in satisfying this fundamental need. This article reconceptualizes the risk-regulation model to argue that people draw on experiences from inside and outside their romantic relationships to satisfy their fundamental need to feel safe depending on others. We first review the direct relational cues (i.e., a partner's affectionate touch, responsive versus unresponsive behavior, and relative power) and indirect cues (i.e., bodily sensations, collective value in the eyes of others, and living conditions) that signal the current safety of social connection and motivate people to connect to others or protect themselves against them. We then review how people's chronic capacity to trust in others controls their sensitivity and reactivity to the safety cues. The article concludes with future research directions.

Does it Matter Who You Feel Sexually Aroused By? Associations Between Sexual Arousal, Relationship Quality, and Sexual Satisfaction

Background

Despite its integral role in normative sexual functioning, there is a dearth of research into the role of subjective sexual arousal within romantic relationships.

Aim

The current proof-of-concept study addresses this gap by investigating the associations between partner-induced sexual arousal, sexual arousal induced by others, and sexual satisfaction and relationship quality.

Methods

One hundred and sixteen heterosexual couples who had been together for an average of three and a half years completed an online survey. An Actor-Partner Interdependence Modelling framework was applied to analyze the dyadic data.

Outcomes

Participants completed the Perceived Relationship Quality Components (PRQC) Inventory and a single item global measure of sexual satisfaction derived for the current study.

Results

Feeling sexually aroused by one's romantic partner was positively associated with one's own sexual satisfaction and relationship quality. However, feeling sexually aroused by people other than one's romantic partner was negatively associated with one's own sexual satisfaction and relationship quality. These associations were found for both men and women.

Clinical Translation

Therapists and practitioners may need to place an emphasis on using strategies and techniques that specifically facilitate or heighten partner-induced sexual arousal, whilst helping couples to move away from those behaviors and situations which typically lead to sexual arousal induced by those other than their partner.

Strengths & Limitations

This proof-of-concept study provides novel findings that address the absence of research investigating the associations between sexual arousal and outcomes in romantic relationships. The well-powered dyadic study design enabled a rigorous test of the hypotheses. However, the study was cross-sectional in nature, the sample was somewhat homogenous, and assessments included brief measures of sexual arousal and sexual satisfaction.

Conclusion

The findings offer the first evidence to suggest that partner-induced sexual arousal and non–partner-induced sexual arousal have differential effects in terms of sexual satisfaction and relationship quality. This not only has a raft of clinical implications, but it provides the basis for several important avenues of future research on the role of subjective sexual arousal in romantic relationships.

Lawless NJ, Karantzas GC, Mullins ER, et al. Does it Matter Who You Feel Sexually Aroused By? Associations Between Sexual Arousal, Relationship Quality, and Sexual Satisfaction. Sex Med 2022;10:100523.

Sexual Desire Mediates the Relationship-Promoting Effects of Perceived Partner Mate Value

Although sexual desire for one's partner is theorized to serve as a gut-level indicator of partner mate value that motivates investment in valued partners, there is scant empirical evidence to support this hypothesis. Five studies addressed this possibility, examining whether experiencing sexual desire encouraged the enactment of relationship-promoting behaviors and whether perceptions of partner mate value motivated this proposed process. In a pilot study and Study 1, participants relived an activity they experienced with their partner, which was either sexual or non-sexual. Then, participants rated their desire to engage in sex and other non-sexual relationship-promoting activities with their partner (pilot study) and their partner's responsiveness to personal disclosures. Participants' enacted responsiveness was also evaluated by judges (Study 1). Results showed that experiences of desire enhanced relationship-promoting tendencies. Using experimental, daily experiences, and longitudinal methods, Studies 2-4 extended these findings, indicating that both manipulated and perceived partner mate value predicted desire, which, in turn, was associated with engagement in relationship-promoting behaviors. These findings demonstrate that sexual desire functions as a mechanism encouraging investment in partners who are perceived to be worth pursuing and retaining.

We're Not That Choosy: Emerging Evidence of a Progression Bias in Romantic Relationships

Dating is widely thought of as a test phase for romantic relationships, during which new romantic partners carefully evaluate each other for long-term fit. However, this cultural narrative assumes that people are well equipped to reject poorly suited partners. In this article, we argue that humans are biased toward pro-relationship decisions-decisions that favor the initiation, advancement, and maintenance of romantic relationships. We first review evidence for a progression bias in the context of relationship initiation, investment, and breakup decisions. We next consider possible theoretical underpinnings-both evolutionary and cultural-that may explain why getting into a relationship is often easier than getting out of one, and why being in a less desirable relationship is often preferred over being in no relationship at all. We discuss potential boundary conditions that the phenomenon may have, as well as its implications for existing theoretical models of mate selection and relationship development.

Towards a Comprehensive Theory of Love: The Quadruple Theory

Scholars across an array of disciplines including social psychologists have been trying to explain the meaning of love for over a century but its polysemous nature has made it difficult to fully understand. In this paper, a quadruple framework of attraction, resonance or connection, trust, and respect are proposed to explain the meaning of love. The framework is used to explain how love grows and dies and to describe brand love, romantic love, and parental love. The synergistic relationship between the factors and how their variations modulate the intensity or levels of love are discussed.

Pursuing Sex with an Ex: Does It Hinder Breakup Recovery?

The present research used longitudinal methods to test whether pursuing sex with an ex-partner hinders breakup recovery. Participants completed a month-long daily diary immediately following a breakup, as well as a two-month follow-up (Study 1). Daily analyses revealed positive associations between trying to have sex with an ex-partner and emotional attachment to the ex-partner, but not other aspects of breakup recovery, such as distress, intrusive thoughts, or negative affect. Longitudinal changes from day to day, and over 2 months, revealed that pursuing sex with an ex was not a predictor of breakup recovery over time. To address the limitation that Study 1 only assessed attempted sexual pursuits, Study 2 explored associations between pursuit of, and actual engagement in, sexual activities with ex-partners. Results revealed that most sexual pursuits were successful, and success rates were not associated with breakup recovery. Findings challenge common beliefs about potential harm of pursuing sex with an ex.

Attachment in Adulthood: Recent Developments, Emerging Debates, and Future Directions

Some of the most emotionally powerful experiences result from the development, maintenance, and disruption of attachment relationships. In this article, I review several emerging themes and unresolved debates in the social-psychological study of adult attachment, including debates about the ways in which attachment-related functions shift over the course of development, what makes some people secure or insecure in their close relationships, consensual nonmonogamy, the evolutionary function of insecure attachment, and models of thriving through relationships.

On the Nature of Objectification: Implications of Considering People as Means to Goals

People are objectified when they are treated as a means to a goal. The most common example is when women are sexually objectified and reduced to their physical appearance, sexuality, or individual body parts. In such instances, people are used in the same way as objects and are evaluated according to their instrumentality to the others' goals. The aim of this paper is to gain a better understanding of objectification. We will (a) outline basic principles of means-goal relations during goal pursuit, (b) review research in which people are means to goals, (c) explain objectification according to a means-goal psychology in which people serve as means to goals, and (d) explain the implications of our account for the consequences of objectification. Specifically, we argue objectification is inevitable and that the consequences of objectification, including its morality, depend on the goal to which a person serves and whether the objectified person wants to serve that goal.

The Fragile Spell of Desire: A Functional Perspective on Changes in Sexual Desire Across Relationship Development

The sexual behavioral system evolved to motivate reproductive acts by arousing sexual desire. Building on the idea that this system has also been "exploited" by evolutionary processes to promote enduring bonds between romantic partners, the present article introduces an integrative model that delineates the functional significance of sexual desire in relationship formation and maintenance. This model explains why individuals' sexual reaction to their partner is context-dependent, clarifying how changes in the nature of interdependence over the course of relationships alter the ways in which specific predictors of sexual desire tend to promote (or inhibit) desire and thereby affect relationship depth and stability. The model postulates that although desire influences the development of attachment bonds, the contribution that it makes varies over the course of relationships. The model also provides new insight regarding fundamental but unresolved issues in human sexuality, such as the vulnerability of sexual desire and the desire-intimacy paradox.

Sex Unleashes Your Tongue: Sexual Priming Motivates Self-Disclosure to a New Acquaintance and Interest in Future Interactions

Research has demonstrated the contribution of sexual activity to the quality of ongoing relationships. Nevertheless, less attention has been given to how activation of the sexual system affects relationship-initiation processes. Three studies used complementary methodologies to examine the effect of sexual priming on self-disclosure, a relationship-promoting behavior. In Study 1, participants were subliminally exposed to sexual stimuli (vs. neutral stimuli), and then disclosed over Instant Messenger a personal event to an opposite-sex stranger. Results showed that merely thinking about sex, even without being aware of it, encouraged self-disclosure. Study 2 replicated these findings in relatively naturalistic conditions (live face-to-face interactions following supraliminal video priming). Study 3 extended these findings, indicating that sexual priming facilitated self-disclosure, which, in turn, increased interest in future interactions with the stranger. Together, these findings suggest that activation of the sexual system encourages the use of strategies that allow people to become closer to potential partners.

Activating Attachments Reduces Memories of Traumatic Images

Emotional memories, and especially intrusive memories, are a common feature of many psychological disorders, and are overconsolidated by stress. Attachment theory posits that activation of mental representations of attachment figures can reduce stress and boost coping. This study tested the proposition that attachment activation would reduce consolidation of emotional and intrusive memories. Sixty-seven undergraduate students viewed subliminal presentations of traumatic and neutral images, which were preceded by subliminal presentations of either attachment-related images or non-attachment-related images; free recall and intrusive memories were assessed two days later. Participants with low avoidant attachment tendencies who received the attachment primes recalled fewer memories and reported fewer intrusions than those who received the non-attachment primes. Unexpectedly, those with high anxious attachment tendencies reported fewer memories. These findings generally accord with attachment theory, and suggest that consolidation of emotional memories can be moderated by activation of attachment representations.

Effects of Suboptimally Presented Erotic Pictures on Moral Judgments: A Cross-Cultural Comparison

Previous research has identified a set of core factors that influence moral judgments. The present study addresses the interplay between moral judgments and four factors: (a) incidental affects, (b) sociocultural context, (c) type of dilemma, and (d) participant’s sex. We asked participants in two different countries (Colombia and Spain) to judge the acceptability of actions in response to personal and impersonal moral dilemmas. Before each dilemma an affective prime (erotic, pleasant or neutral pictures) was presented suboptimally. Our results show that: a) relative to neutral priming, erotic primes increase the acceptance of harm for a greater good (i.e., more utilitarian judgments), b) relative to Colombians, Spanish participants rated causing harm as less acceptable, c) relative to impersonal dilemmas, personal dilemmas reduced the acceptance of harm, and d) relative to men, women were less likely to consider harm acceptable. Our results are congruent with findings showing that sex is a crucial factor in moral cognition, and they extend previous research by showing the interaction between culture and incidental factors in the making of moral judgments.

Exploring linguistic correlates of social anxiety in romantic stories

The current study used computerized linguistic analysis of stories about either going on a date or taking a walk down a street to examine linguistic correlates of social anxiety in a sample of undergraduate students. In general, linguistic analysis revealed associations of social anxiety with several linguistic variables, including negative emotion, affect, and anxiety words. Participants higher in social anxiety wrote fewer affect words. The relationship between social anxiety and anxiety words depended on gender, whereas the relationship between social anxiety and negative emotion words depended on both gender and the nature of primes (supraliminal vs. subliminal) received. Overall, our findings highlight the potential utility and benefits of using linguistic analysis as another source of information about how individuals higher in social anxiety process romantic stimuli.

Unconscious Desire: The Affective and Motivational Aspects of Subliminal Sexual Priming

Sexual arousal is thought to be the result of the processing of sexual cues at two levels: conscious and unconscious. Whereas numerous studies have examined the affective and motivational responses to supraliminal (consciously processed) sexual cues, much less is known regarding the responses to subliminal (processed outside of one's awareness) sexual cues. Five studies examined responses to subliminal sexual cues. Studies 1–3 demonstrated increases in adults' positive affect following exposure to subliminal sexual cues compared to control cues. Study 4 demonstrated that the positive affect resulting from exposure to subliminal sexual cues increased motivation to further engage in a neutral task. Study 5 provided evidence suggesting that the affect and motivation found in Studies 1–4 were associated with motivation to engage in sex specifically, rather than a general approach motivation. The implications of these findings for the processing of subliminal sexual cues and for human sexuality are discussed.

Like a Horse and Carriage?

Abstract. Sexual urges and emotional attachments are not necessarily interrelated. Still, within romantic relationships, intimates typically function as both attachment figures and sexual partners, such that the attachment and sexual systems may influence one another. The present article reviews the reciprocal relation between these two systems. Specifically, previous studies have demonstrated the contribution of attachment processes to the appraisal of sexual interactions in adolescence and adulthood. Other studies have considered the reverse causal direction, focusing on the function of sex as a promoter of emotional bonds and on the circumstances under which this function is more pronounced. In doing so, some of these studies have investigated the role of attachment processes in linking sexuality with relationship quality and in shaping sexual responses to relationship-threatening events. More research is needed to explore the dual potential of sex as a relationship maintenance mechanism and as a force motivating people to pursue alternative partners.

Gender Differences in Liking and Wanting Sex: Examining the Role of Motivational Context and Implicit Versus Explicit Processing

The present study investigated the specificity of sexual appraisal processes by making a distinction between implicit and explicit appraisals and between the affective (liking) and motivational (wanting) valence of sexual stimuli. These appraisals are assumed to diverge between men and women, depending on the context in which the sexual stimulus is encountered. Using an Implicit Association Test, explicit ratings, and film clips to prime a sexual, romantic or neutral motivational context, we investigated whether liking and wanting of sexual stimuli differed at the implicit and explicit level, differed between men and women, and were differentially sensitive to context manipulations. Results showed that, at the implicit level, women wanted more sex after being primed with romantic mood whereas men showed the least wanting of sex in the romantic condition. At the explicit level, men reported greater liking and wanting of sex than women, independently of context. We also found that women's (self-reported) sexual behavior was best predicted by the incentive salience of sexual stimuli whereas men's sexual behavior was more closely related to the hedonic qualities of sexual stimuli. Results were discussed in relation to an emotion-motivational account of sexual functioning.

Sexual narcissism and infidelity in early marriage

There is theoretical reason to believe that narcissism is associated with infidelity. Yet, studies that have examined this association have yielded inconsistent results. Given that these inconsistencies may have emerged because prior studies used global assessments of narcissism that do not capture the extent to which the components of narcissism are activated in the sexual domain, the current research drew from two longitudinal studies of 123 married couples to examine the extent to which sexual narcissism predicted marital infidelity. Consistent with the idea that narcissism predicts sexual behavior when activated in the sexual domain, own sexual narcissism was positively associated with infidelity, controlling for own marital and sexual satisfaction, own globally-assessed narcissism, partner globally-assessed narcissism, and partner sexual narcissism. Helping to explain why this association emerged, further analyses demonstrated that it was driven by all four facets of sexual narcissism-sexual exploitation, grandiose sense of sexual skill, sexual entitlement (Study 1 only), and lack of sexual empathy (husbands only). Additionally, although partner sexual narcissism was unrelated to infidelity on average, partners' grandiose sense of sexual skill and partners' sexual entitlement (Study 2 only) were positively associated with infidelity, and partners' lack of sexual empathy was negatively associated with infidelity (Study 2 only). These findings highlight the benefits of using domain-specific measures of sexual narcissism in research on sexual behavior and the benefits of using domain-specific measures of personality more generally.

Neural correlates of exposure to subliminal and supraliminal sexual cues

Sexual arousal is thought to be the result of two levels of processing: conscious and unconscious. Whereas some research exists on the neural correlates related with conscious exposure to sexual stimuli, there are no parallel data regarding unconscious or subliminal exposure to such stimuli. In the present study, we therefore compared brain activation of 39 participants (20 women) as they were exposed to supraliminal vs subliminal sexual stimuli. Supraliminal exposure was associated with greater activation in areas that were previously associated with sexual arousal (e.g. caudate nucleus and thalamus) as well as areas that were previously associated with control (e.g. orbitofrontal cortex and cingulate cortex). In contrast, subliminal exposure was mainly related to activation in areas previously associated with sexual arousal. Men and women exhibited theoretically meaningful differences in patterns of activation associated with supra- and subliminal exposure. Findings are discussed with regard to sexual arousal and regulatory processes.

The valence of sex:Automatic affective associations in erotophilia and erotophobia

Sexual stimuli may elicit positive and negative emotions that can impact sexual thoughts, responses, and behavior. To date, most research on affect and sexuality has focused on conscious processes and affective states. Less is known about how automatic and trait-level affective processes influence our reactions to sexual stimuli. This study used a priming task with backward masking and a trait measure of erotophobia-erotophilia - the tendency to respond to sex on a negative-to-positive continuum - to improve our understanding of the role of automatic and affective processes in response to sexual stimuli. Erotophilic individuals demonstrated automatic associations between sexual primes and positively-valenced targets, whereas erotophobic individuals classified negatively-valenced targets faster regardless of whether primes were sexual or neutral. The findings suggest that the valence of sexual stimuli can be processed automatically and is associated with trait-level affective responses to sex. Implications for research on risky sexual behavior and sexual dysfunction are discussed.

Different perspectives on the sex-attachment link: towards an emotion-motivational account

Although the link between sex and attachment was made decades ago (Hazan & Shaver, 1987), theories on sexual and attachment functioning have been developed in relative isolation. Recent efforts to integrate both literatures have been complicated by the fact that the sex-attachment link has been approached from very different perspectives, including biological, evolutionary, developmental, cognitive, and social psychology approaches. Also, at the empirical level, research on sex and attachment lacks overarching synthesis. This article gives an overview of the most important theoretical ideas and empirical insights on sex and attachment. It starts with describing general models that approach the sex-attachment link from an evolutionary and neurobiological perspective. Then, it summarizes theoretical and empirical ideas of attachment theory and describes how attachment style differences are manifested in intimate and sexual relationships. Research so far has been limited to studying the predicted link between sex and attachment in terms of broad descriptives, and it would benefit the literature to specify the processes and pathways that mediate the sex-attachment link. After a short discussion of the functional similarities between the sexual and the attachment systems, the article describes some specific--dynamical--models that focus on the emotional and cognitive-motivational processes through which attachment schemas influence sexual experiences. Such an emotion-motivational perspective on sex and attachment can help to organize theoretical ideas and empirical findings and eventually promote an integrative view on how attachment dynamics can interact with sexual experiences.

Sex buffers intimates against the negative implications of attachment insecurity

Contextual models of relationships and recent theories of attachment system activation suggest that experiences that promote intimacy, such as sexual intercourse, may moderate the negative implications of attachment insecurity. In two independent studies, 207 couples reported their attachment insecurity, the frequency of their sexual intercourse over the past 30 days, their expectancies for their partner's availability, and their marital satisfaction, and in a 7-day diary they reported their daily sexual and relationship satisfaction and their expectancies for how satisfied they would be with their partners' availability the next day. Attachment avoidance was unrelated to marital satisfaction among spouses reporting more frequent sex, and attachment anxiety was unrelated to marital satisfaction among spouses reporting more daily sexual satisfaction. Both effects were mediated by expectancies for partner availability. These findings suggest that the effects of attachment insecurity are not immutable but vary according to the context of the relationship.