Dissociative Collusion: Reconnecting Clients with Histories of Trauma in Couple Therapy

This paper introduces the concept of "dissociative collusion" as a helpful theoretical and clinical tool for understanding and working with clients with histories of trauma in couple therapy. The paper describes ways to diagnose and treat dissociative collusion based on the integration of an object relations approach, a relational approach, and a narrative approach. Dissociative collusion, a unique version of the well-documented "couple collusion," describes relational unconscious dynamics where split-off aspects of one or both partners are mutually dissociated in a complementary fashion that becomes a part of the shared unconscious and is reenacted in destructive ways. The dissociative collusion concept is especially relevant to couple therapists who work with clients with histories of trauma, who frequently use dissociation as a primary defense mechanism. We suggest that the challenge and goal for couple therapy with this population are to help them reconnect and better oscillate between dissociated self-other configurations. A case of couple therapy of a wife who had been a victim of childhood sexual abuse and her husband who displayed frequent use of dissociative defenses is presented.

Couples therapy with childhood sexual abuse survivors (CSA) and their partners: establishing a context for witnessing

This article proposes a clinical practice for therapy with couples in which one partner suffered sexual abuse in childhood. Such couples often encounter unique difficulties with physical contact, intimacy, sexuality, communication, and trust, and their relationship dynamic may be marked by reenactments of past traumatic relational patterns. This clinical practice is founded on the assumption that establishing the witnessing lacking during the traumatic event in childhood can break the traumatic reenactments in adulthood, and spur recovery. The suggested practice may facilitate twofold witnessing: the couple's therapist witnesses the reenactments of the trauma in the couple's relationship; and the survivor's partner witnesses the trauma's effect on the survivor's personal life and relationship. Twofold witnessing can help break the cycle of traumatic reenactment and help the survivor integrate the events of her life into a more coherent, continuous narrative. The partner's presence also facilitates acknowledgement of what happened to the survivor, and helps the survivor elaborate on her stories of resistance, survival, and strength. Finally, each of the partners is able to appear more wholly and fully, and together to tell the preferred stories of their life as a couple, replete with the multiple relational patterns they wish to live, which may contradict the characteristics of the original trauma.